Well, I sit here at the end of yet another day with no news...43 days so far to be exact. The days are starting to feel very long and we are beginning to feel very weary. I never knew that silence could physically feel so heavy. We are praying our hearts out accompanied by many tears. It is so hard because it feels like what we are asking for is a good thing, for God to make a way for Georgia to get here so that she can have surgery and heal....but that silence remains.
...and I am not God. The only part of this journey that I can see is my dim little world and the days clicking by. What I cannot see (what I would give anything to see) is the bigger picture. What is happening for Georgia? What is happening around her in her story that we do not know.
I can drive myself crazy with what ifs (and have come very close to doing that) but the real solid things that I can put my weight on, over and over are the promises of God. I have been clinging to, repeating to myself, soaking myself in this verse from Habakkuk 2:3. Here it is in the NIV version:
'For the Vision is yet for an appointed time;
But at the end it will speak,
and it will not lie.
Though it tarries, wait for it;
Because it will surely come,
It will not tarry.'
and here it is in the Message version:
And then God answered: "Write this.
Write what you see.Write it out in big block letters
so that it can be read on the run.This vision-message is a witness
pointing to what's coming.It aches for the coming—it can hardly wait!
And it doesn't lie.If it seems slow in coming, wait.
It's on its way. It will come right on time.
It is actually really interesting to be in a place of no obvious movement. I am beginning to see things differently. It is sort of like sitting on a mountainside to take in the view, to begin with you only see the massive view, the clouds, the blue sky. But then as you sit, you start to notice the contours of the cliffs, the shading of the trees, the grass and rocks at your feet. I am beginning to see my prayers change, deepen as I have more time to take in the complexity of the situation.
I have found myself a few times in the last few days absolutely moved to tears by the fact that the God of the Universe has chosen us (Doug & I and all of you walking alongside us) to walk this journey. It is a journey that I have absolutely no strength, wisdom or expertise to walk. It is a journey that I look at and say that I cannot do and the only way I can do it is to lean on the Lord...and you know what? He whispers, "come, step, follow". I may be weary, bone tired and completely afraid but there is nowhere else I would rather be than hand in hand with the Lord on this path.