I have decided that the word of the day today is Vigilant.
I felt like all day every fiber of my being was constantly aware of Georgia and where she was, how she was breathing, if she was sweaty at all. Each time she would goof off and pretend she was a doggy panting with her tongue out put about a thousand more gray hairs on my head!
She seemed to do well today but now I just worry. The circles under her eyes seemed darker...but was it just me? Did her lips have some blue in them? Was that funky breath one I should record?
She had one episode today but it was like yesterday...not exactly like the ones before. It happened on the middle of the little toll bridge that connects our town to the Oregon side of the Columbia river. She was breathing funny and had a very concerned look on her face. I asked her if her heart felt funny, she looked up with her big brown eyes and said, "Yes." I asked, should we do the monitor? and again as serious as could be she said, "Yes." But we were in the middle of a tiny bridge with no where to pull over and a line of cars at the toll booth. So by the time we did our ticket and found the closest place to pull over, got her unbuckled and the monitor on...she started smiling and saying in her giangantic voive, "My Sheen!!!!! My Sheen!!!!" So I'm pretty sure we missed that one.
In the car, I heard her playing with her Pooh Bear and Tigger. The conversation went like this, "Wahhhh Mama!", "Baby, you ok? You need monitor?" As I looked in the mirror I saw the Pooh bear hug the Tigger and say, "Love you baby..."
We are surrounded by family and friends who are calling and emailing and showing up and it is a lifeline for us. Just when I feel like I may crumble someone sends something, and I am a puddle of tears as I am reminded that we are not alone.
I did get one question, someone asking if we are praying for healing and why we are making plans like where Life Flight should go and who would watch our kids. I just want to put it out there that yes...with every fiber of our beings we are begging God to heal Georgia. We also know that as parents we have to do everything we can to prepare for the fact that He may heal her through what this monitor finds and through modern medicine. He knows her heart and her days and YES pray for her healing...please. At the same time....because of her heart, we need to know something definitive...maybe that is for my heart, I don't know. We have to get to the bottom of what is causing these spells because life cannot go on knowing that 'sudden death' might be an outcome...I owe it to my little girl to push until that is taken off the table.
At the same time, I swear that Georgia is more full of life than ever. I feel like I am trying to just soak her in with all that I am. It would never be enough....I don't think I could even breathe without her.
Throughout this whole day, saying goodbye to Doug, watching Georgia like crazy. Walking miles of aisles of Target, Walmart, Goodwill etc so that I could watch Georgia best. I could feel God's presence, hear His voice reminding me that He is here. When I went to call in Georgia's episode, I again freaked out this poor guy working at a gas station (I've got to figure out how to explain it better), I swear he turned green and walked outside to smoke as soon as I had the phone! But another gentleman was there getting coffe. He left and then walked back in. He stood beside me and said, "I am a paramedic and I am going to stay until we know your girl is ok."
God is there...right in the crux of it reminding me that I am not alone.
Reminding me that He is Vigilant and knows my heart and my fears and carries me in this storm where I feel like I cannot take even one step...
"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit."
Psalm 34:18
(Right here she is praying for me and my 'owie tummy')
Thank you so much for praying...please, please, please continue.
I came across this song today...another gift from God, the words bring me to pray when I cannot find my own.
To read the details of what is going on with Georgia's heart please go here
17 comments:
Friend, I am in tears. Just the mommy instinct that looks into her beautiful brown eyes and melts just a little more every time.
And so full of live that girl is! I continue to pray. And am reminded that we are given JOY in the midst of trials. We can't allow the enemy to steal it. We can't allow circumstances or fear to steal it. It's a gift from Him - just as your Georgia is.
So I am praying tonight for wisdom for you. For peace for your heart. For a wise vigilance and a trust in her maker. For JOY to shake any walls of fear. For JOY that your Georgia knows Her heavenly father and He works overtime on her behalf.
So thankful that you are sharing as God is growing your heart (in all those ways that require faith!)
So thankful for you. For Georgia. For the angels that he has sent you (oh come on... you mean you don't think that paramedic was one? :)
PRAYING for you and Georgia's heart!
So thankful you have support around--even in strangers. The lives you are touching is a gift to everyone you are meeting ... I pray for healing and for peace for you all in knowing that you have done all you can and have placed it in God's hands.
P.S. Those big brown eyes are like melted chocolate pools! Oh so sweet!
Praying for that beautiful Chinese treasure andf that she has strenght and you will get the answers you need! Lots of love from the Funk's
www.campfunk.blogspot.com
Praying and believing with you today for Georgia's complete healing. May His Kingdom come, and His will be done in her heart!
We have Georgia in ours prayers!!! Jesus has her heart in His hands.
saw your comment on Linny's blog and rejoiced that you were the first one. Everyone will read it!!
Isn't it amazing how God will take us right into a raging storm to show us that He can not only calm the storm (as is accounted in the Gospels) but that He can also calm US in the storm?!?! He is so good and I am thankful that you feel His goodness all around.
And I just want to reaffirm that your planning is not a lack of faith. You know full well that God CAN heal Georgia's heart with just one word...but you also trust that in His sovereignty He may have a different plan. It's wise to make sure you are prepared on every end. Of course, it's also good to remind yourself that no matter how much planning you may do it is entirely out of your hands...and in MUCH more capable ones! Praying for you my precious friend!!!
Shannon,
You and Doug are in my prayers and I know you two bear this burden the most heavily.
May I say "shame on that friend" who basically accused you of not having enough faith for healing. I'm sure they meant well, but God allows us trials. He gifts doctors to do the work of healing and often leads us to the means of medical help for that healing. Occasionally God will heal miraculously without modern medicine intervention.
God commands us to "ask, seek, knock". That is what you are doing. At any time, God can reach down and miraculously heal Georgia's heart, but He may also have a lesson for you, Doug, your kids by allowing you to walk this journey through modern medicine.
His plan may be to heal through the medical practices. He may be waiting to heal for later so you may encounter this faith-testing time.
Heaven forbid, He may allow Georgia to die for a lesson unknown for all of us. Whatever happens, it's God's will. We have to trust that His will is perfect and will work for good.
God does not promise to work miracles based solely on our faith. Our faith in His perfect will does not mean that His will conforms to our will...in this case Georgia's healing. It means our will conforms to His perfect will...whatever that may be. Time will tell.
I do know this. God has lead you in your journey of finding Georgia to be part of your family. God has held you as you longed for her and prayed for her health to hold until you could bring her to the doctors. God performed miracles to keep Georgia alive and allowed modern medicine to save her life in repairing her heart. God has allowed Georgia to give you opportunities to grow in your faith and love for Him. God is allowing Georgia to go through another health trial that potentially is life threatening... the purpose is to be seen....
Right now what I see happening because of this trial is that 1. You are needing to lean heavily on him for comfort and guidance. 2. You are excersizing your faith in his perfect will while also doing your part, 3. You are reminded of your love for her and cherishing her more than you have before... even if we thought the love couldn't deepen any more, it is. 4. Your friends and family are spurred on to hold you in prayer and be faithful to the direction that we are to pray without ceasing. Also that we are to do good and support our brothers and sisters of the faith. Our faith is being tested and strengthened as well.
Hold on tight, yet loosely so you allow God His will. You are doing everything that you need to do and the things you aren't able to do, I'm sure God is carrying for you.
I am praying for your family and Georgia's health and safety. God will bring you through this. We pray his will is for Georgia to have the problem in her heart discovered and either healed or treated either miraculously or through modern medicine...whichever GOD chooses. To ignore the avenue of medicine that God has allowed humans to learn and know about HIS creation, would be foolish. That avenue may just be His leading and His will.
When it's not God's will, you will know it.
I love you two and your family. Take care and know you are in capable Hands with our Lord.
<3 Elizabeth
I just wrote you a novel...and then a message come up saying the URL was too large...and now my letter is gone.
I will try to write you later. In the meantime, know your family is in my prayers and their is nothing wrong with your faith by allowing doctors to work with you and her.
Love,
Elizabeth
Hi popped on over from a Place Called Simplicity. Just prayed for your request and your sweet baby girl.
Blessings,
Suzanne
freedomhollowfarmkiddos.blogspot.com
The responses to your post here are amazing...what comfort you must feel with so many faithful people praying for you and your sweet Georgia.
Of course you are praying for Georgia's complete healing! And of course you are doing everything possible as loving and responsible parents to insure she will be okay while you wait for answers. Isn't it amazing and wonderful GOd provided that paramedic for you in the gas station....an angel? Certainly seems so to me....whether heavenly or earthly!
What you are going through is so very challenging...so difficult I cannot imagine it....your faith shines through it all and your precious daughter Georgia...my goodness what a joy she is.
Like so many others, I continue to pray for all of you too and echo the thoughts of so many here today.
Praying and praying for you and Georgia. She is absolutely beautiful, inside and out. What a precious sweetheart and what wonderful, loving Mommy and family she has.
At a loss for words, but your daughter is beautiful and I will continue to pray for her and your family.
I am from Linny's blog and I just want to pray. I will keep praying. I know God didn't create this one on accident and that He will give wisdom to the doctors and healing to her heart. I am trusting our GREAT BIG Father to heal her and bring Peace in the name of Jesus. Amen
Still praying for you and for Georgia. We love you and of course you should be doing all you can along with praying for healing! You are a great mom!!! Keep focusing on God, the only one who knows.
Shannon, I am praying for you all. I always, always think of you when I hear "Mighty to Save." Know that I am believing in the One who can heal Georgia's heart in an instant and asking Him to do just that!
In Him, shelley
SO praying for you and Georgia!!! God already has the plan~ praying He holds you all tight!!!
Blessings!
I once heard this analogy when it comes to blessings of healing vs. medical treatments:
Would a farmer plant his fields and then walk away from them, leaving them alone, praying day after day for a great harvest while the farmer just watches out of the window of his farmhouse. Of course not. And no one would expect the farmer to do that. We would all expect the farmer to follow up on those seeds, to fertilize, water, weed, remove pests, etc - do everything science has taught him is in his power to nurture his crops. And while so doing, yes indeed, that good Christian farmer would ask the Lord to bless his efforts and for a bounteous yield. The farmer is undeterred by the *possibility* that despite his efforts and his prayers, a giant storm could ruin the entire farm.
Likewise, you take Georgia to the doctor, and you and the doctors do everything in your power that science has taught to help bring her healing. And in so doing, you ask the Lord to heal Georgia. You move forward in faith, undeterred by all the possible outcomes.
Of course you still find out where lifeflight can land, because, you, like our Old Testament forefathers have faith in Him regardless of whether His outcome matches your desires, "but if not . . ." (See Daniel 3:17-18 KJV) You move forward in love and devotion, knowing that He knows the ultimate plan for sweet Georgia.
So to me, you taking Georgia to doctors and planning for the possiblities, well, that is the ultimate example of someone who KNOWS that God can answer prayers in so many ways, including through using the time and talents of those around us. But if not, you will still worship Him all your days.
Post a Comment